Saturday, October 29, 2016

The Army of the Dead

“Vengeance is Mine, Saith the Lord, and I'll go with that, but I do take a little myself.”
.                                                                                                              (Brigham Young)


So, I said that there can be no better sword or shield than the truth. Without a doubt it has been said many times. So how can I tell if something is true or not? I have a tool to offer, and I came by it in reading some of Gloria Steinem’s latter day work (hey, even a stopped clock is right twice a day). She writes thus: The truth is synonymous with the rule; therefore if there is no exception to prove the rule, there can be no means of recognizing the truth. This idea intrigued me, as I have written more than one essay on the truth, and had naturally become a seeker.

Try it as a litmus test in your own life and let me know how it has worked for you. I know around fifty or so people who say it works for them as a truth detector; maybe you will find more of it yourself. I’ve often wondered what makes this little trick work so well, but at this time I don't have an answer. I have become so inured to denial as a therapist that I can offer another tool I find to be quite effective. I find that often the truth is the hard thing to admit into our thinking. It’s our capacity for creating blind spots that makes it so. It ain’t Gloria Steinem or anybody; I’m just sayin’.

Let’s take it for a quick spin now. When then President Obama created Obamacare it created a grassroots movement in politics. Before a hostile media began attacking the Tea Party from the left, there were democrats liberal, and not so much so in the party. Once this media attack separated people whose long views were compatible, the party became an easy mark for super pacs. You remember, Rush and Bill going at it day and night; Clear Channel sweeping up more than a thousand low megawatt radio stations with one preacher after another doing conservative talk radio. When I listen to TV evangelists I always do it over a martini . . . or two . . .or six.  Anyway, Those super packs  rented mailing lists, both electronic and home delivery. And then what do you think they did? Blasphemy! I dare you to keep reading. Super packs, media, mind control, but I digress.

 So, yeah; they solicited millions of dollars each. Overwhelmingly these contributors who were low to mid income individuals. Congratulations; if you made it this far you can see the exception to the rule. If you contributed, you were the exception to a business that was as corrupt as the government it spawned. Still, they plunked you and took almost all of the money for themselves. Perfectly legal. Now, to be fair, most of the candidates that these jokers claimed to represent sent them cease and desist letters, but the damage was done. Over on Politico Ken Vogel wrote that the Tea Party movement was dead, and in fact, a couple of polls show that only seventeen percent or less of Americans identify with the Tea Party. I bet I sound like a smarty pants laughing at the Tea Party; I am in fact feeling the opposite of humor. There is within me a righteous anger that these bandit style raids on the American people brew in me. These people outright scammed the people of MY country; and it has been devastating. It has made those people MY people cynical so that we no longer respect anyone's opinion but our own. It has taken the wind out of our sails. Unions busted so that the retirement funds can be stolen; legally! Schools utterly devastated so as to create a voucher system for schools that do not teach our children's children anymore. Terrorism and war, all for profit, a vice president who made millions on a no contract award to a company which he had part ownership. Huh? Look, the list goes on and on and I’m about as sick of saying it as you are of hearing it.

There is a controlling monopoly in politics. They set the players, push the buttons, and the coffee always comes out with cream and sugar, just like it’s supposed to. Look at the current race. If Mitt Romney were running against Hillary, he'd stomp a hole in her butt, and walk it dry, but the monopoly didn't want that. They needed an inexperienced person, known to be flamboyant, who, while giving the appearance of running a good race was no match for a consummate politician, in the pocket of the monopoly. These guys run as tight a game as a Vegas casino. The managers of the casinos can predict within one percent how things turn out at the end of the night, and if that percentage begins to slide they just spin the wheel and, it'll land on the “Green Bastard” every time.



So, what am I getting at? Well, I for one think most people feel pretty much the same as I do. My party has nothing for me, and the other party is anathema. The Tea Party had been my home, but I think Vogel is right. Ned Ryun is right too I think. Mr. Ryun heads up education and support for local and regional Tea Party development, and he says it’s time to go home and start over again; time to roll up your sleeves and build it with your hands. I like that idea. There is a huge army of the dead, but they're not dead, they are disappointed. They are the heart and soul of America. They ARE the Tea Party, and I want  to raise up an army of the dead and head for D.C. because it's time to take a little ourselves....and that’s the truth.

Friday, October 28, 2016

What is Truth? The Jesus Algorithm

“Then You are a king?” Pilate said.

“You say that I am a king,” Jesus answered. “For this reason I was born and have come into the world, to testify to the truth. Everyone who belongs to the truth listens to My voice.”

“What is truth?” Pilate asked.



What goes up must come down; once you clear the atmosphere of this world that is. The Sikhs have an expression: it is harder to ascend than it is to descend. While the meaning of that statement appears in the text of various other religions, it never does so quite as directly. I like the expression, although, as an American I suppose I can relate to it more easily if I say that  it is easier to descend than to ascend.

. We Americans like things easy don’t we? We like easy so much that I sometimes think it a miracle that we bother to step out of the way of a speeding bus. There is so much trouble we haven't bothered to avoid. Electing a member of the House On Un American Activities Commission,  president of our then great nation, allowing President Ford to pardon the same guy after he did exactly what he could have been expected to do, letting that disaster for democracy go down in Florida, Electing every president since Reagan (we get a pass on Reagan; if you want to know why, watch the Dick Cheney’s interview with frontline on Youtube). There are a lot more instances, but you get my drift. I can hear us now when we are called to judgement; God: “Why did you not act to preserve my mercy?” Us: “What could I have done Lord?”

Well, we could have protested en mass. We could have written editorials,  taught our children that we screwed it, up and worked with them to fix it. But, that wouldn't have been easy. Well, easy gets us Trump vs Hillary. Easy got us a busted economy with the thieving crooks spending our children's legitimate inheritance right in our face while more and more of us go broke. Easy gets us no borders, and a completely broken immigration policy. Folks, it's time to realize that easy isn't easy any longer. When I say this in conversation I get no disagreement, but I do get a lot of uncomfortable silence; that's because it's hard to say “I made a mistake.”

It is incomprehensible to me, but we seem to prefer sticking to our dumb stories to fixing what is wrong. I’ll share something with all of you, it is a secret that I wish you would all shout from the rooftops; there ain't no forgiveness without reconciliation. I simply will not lie. Why? Because I have discovered that there is no better shield or sword than the truth. Unless you're facing an enemy that will kill you unless you have, you know, a real sword. But it has to be like that. Let’s see, WWII, we needed a real sword, Korea? Yep, real sword. Argentina? Not so much.

Jesus had this figured out. He brought mankind a perfect algorithm for solving society's ills. If everyone but followed the algorithmic formula as Jesus formulated it then where would we be? Not looking at four more years of the reign of terror that has now managed to span three generations I’ll bet. I promised you an answer to our daily dilemma and this is it: as an individual person, follow the words of Jesus to the letter. I hear some of you now. It sounds like Nah, Gimme that old time religion; You know, the church that lets me buy my way into heaven while practicing sin. Yet we call ourselves Christians. Yeah, read your Revelations. In Revelations it is explicitly said that the time would come when there would be no way to live in the world without sinning, and that the only salvation would be to fall to your knees and pray for it until you die. Now, between you and me I’ll share something unpleasant; I follow my own advice. It’s been a long, hard road, but it has a solid foundation built on the bedrock of experience. But, while I have transformed my own life with it, and made some modest improvements on the lives of some of the people I have met, I have had limited success. As a member of my church, I have seen bigger accomplishments, but they are also modest in comparison to the deeds done by those who sell misery. Jesus was the ultimate actuary; he brought us an algorithm that anyone can understand. Your dog can understand it. Still, I suppose most of us will go on throwing everything we don't eat ourselves away, until it is all gone. We cannot help but damn ourselves. It is so easy, you see?

What did Joseph Smith really find on hill Cumorah? What was really in that box? He found the Jesus algorithm! From front to back cover, the Book of Mormon, in spite of the through lines of the story, it is there. Doubters flail at the historical inaccuracies of the book, while they fail to see the algorithm staring them right in the face. Money, or greed, rather, fogged the algorithm, just like it did at the Council of Nicea in the year 325! Joseph did know we were all going to ride the train, but by the time it pulled into Salt Lake City, the algorithm was buried again, waiting for someone else to find it.

I do see a way that like minded folks can join hands to stem the tide of violence and depravity that will soon engulf us all. In the end no one will be spared. The coming siege will touch all of our lives. But there is a way to make it a siege rather than an outright conquest, for our kids sake if not for the sake of our own dignity. That however will take up far more space than I am allotted here. If you wish to ascend, you will have to exert yourself. It wont be the easy ascension like the one we had for so many years, uplifted by the deeds of our forefathers, like a cork ascending on a wave. I will write two more series which shall be named after the truth, and the hands of God. If you are of a mind, we will exert ourselves and rise together to form a wall that will, hopefully, shelter a future that is built on our past. It won’t be easy. What is truth? The Jesus algorithm!

Thursday, October 27, 2016

The Rise of the Algorithm Part III

The Rise Of The Algorithm Part III The Ascension Of The Actuary

Since undertaking the task of explaining the role of Algorithms in modern day reality, I have begun to understand something of the fire that humans possess; a fire which I had thought might be blown out by the gale force winds of change. A Toffler effect so to speak, brought about by exponential changes in technology. Americans might be forgiven for thinking that changes in technology which occurred during the nineteenth century had the same impact as those changes wrought in the twentieth. After all, building an intercontinental railroad system had pretty much the same effect as building an interstate highway network. The creation of  an internet, which connects the majority of humans has had about the same effect as seeing to it that most Americans could read, and then creating a national culture (several really) that depended on readers as the readers depended on the words they read. While the twentieth century passed, first telephones, and then television invaded each and every home and the experience of being human became something that could be scripted; all it takes is an algorithm folks.The difference as I see it is in the impact of technological change on our individual limits in a far denser population. When great changes came in the nineteenth century they created limitless possibilities to practically everyone. Midway through the twentieth century, technology had created great opportunities for fewer and fewer people. Malthus’ dire predictions came true, and the algorithms of prosperity, and population moved inexorably forward; and no amount of pleading would turn them back.

The evidently enduring flame I spoke of has caused me to change much of my thinking though, and, as I shall endeavor to explain, gives me hope as a possible challenge to what had heretofore seemed an inevitable end to us courtesy of our most powerful tool, the algorithm. First, the actuary. Like guns, algorithms don't kill people, people do. An algorithm, like a gun, is a tool and must be wielded by a person with a purpose and a skill. The purpose comes at best, from a group of people whose intentions are creative and constructive. At worst, the purpose comes from a single individual whose purpose is destructive, the deed done on the down low. Examples of the former are algorithms for bedside diagnostics without imaging, and for emergency logistics management; examples of the former might be algorithms for investment transactions, and algorithmic trading; or worse, developing terrorist attacks that strike us through our electronic lives. Think of it; when I was thirty, practically anybody could live in an nineteenth century world. For that matter, they could have prospered in an eighteenth century world. Can most of the thirty somethings of today say the same? You know it ain’t so,Joe. The ubiquitous they have all the rational approaches covered.When us grown ups talk to others who are like minded, we all seem to agree privately that we cannot see any way out of the mess. We know deep down inside that the kind of mistakes were made that can only lead to misery on a scale not known to us outside the imaginations of writers of horror, or perhaps in the memories of those who have seen true war.

Well....what was that hope you was talkin’ about there Theo? O.K. Are the kids outside? Alright, here it is: Sun Tzu said “if you do not know your weakest point, be sure your enemy will”. Well folks, I’m no actuary, but if you think about it, isn't the great density of our connected population

our enemy’s greatest weakness? Aren't all these algorithms concatenated into one big algorithm, each actuary working for an algorithmic fiefdom no one part of the kingdom quite knowing what the other fiefdoms do? I don't think there is any way to avoid a disaster that is basically intercontinental, but I do think we could still bring the giant down before an actuary partners with a data researcher and eliminates the need for human developers. I think we might be able to manage our downfall in such a way that our grandchildren will know what came before them by leaving them some small part of it. Such lays the foundation for the solution; a solution that I will explain in what I promise will be the last I will say on this for a time in our fourth article in this series, Jesus is the algorithm (a phrase given to us by one of the greatest actuaries of our time).


Wednesday, October 26, 2016

BLACKJACK!

The republican party has just drawn to a “seventeen” and Donald Trump is yelling, “BLACKJACK! I danced in the streets of Austin when Bush II took office. Eight years later, after loosing my ass, hat, and all my cattle, I wasn't dancing with near as much enthusiasm. The very fact that Donald Trump could take the nomination by storm proves that there wasn't much power left in the old guard. The GOP went from “Grand Old Party”to “Grab our. . .” well, you know. The political landscape has been redefined according to a populist model heretofore unknown, unless you simply look at history, and understand that people can be pushed only so far before they push back.

Remember that pendulum I keep telling you about? Basically, it works like this: It never rests in the middle. The reason for this is that proponents of each end of the spectrum want their way or the hiway. It's as simple as that. It takes about eight years for the general population to get fed up, and begin to push the pendulum the other way. Obama, and the liberal democrats have had their run. Even supporters are at least considering trying something else. Now, you can tell me all about Trump's many prat-falls, but consider this; he's still THERE! Even if you buy into the CNN polls, and don't see that they polled five democrats they found at a Hillary rally, you must admit that he is still nibbling at her heels, and friends, people do weird crap when they pull that little curtain behind themselves in a voting booth.

Unless Trump gets indicted for the murder of JonBenet he's gonna give Hillary a run for her money, and he has MORE money than she does. The pendulum is going to swing, and it's going to swing wide. Times, they are gonna be a-changing. But, back to my original point. No party could be more against their own nominee than the republican party is today, and do you want to know how much difference that makes? Nothing! Nada! The former republican party has become irrelevant. Paul Ryan stomping around like he's got something to say.

And, it's not just the republican party, this effect will ripple. When the party flexed its muscle and tried to derail the Trump Train they got their feelings hurt. They stacked the deck and Trump just yelled, “BLACKJACK!” They tried to explain to the people that the party was a private entity, and they, the plutocracy owned and operated that entity. BLACKJACK! When asked about his tax returns, Trump just thumbed his nose. BLACKJACK! When “someone” dragged a bunch of old whores out of the closet, Trump just put REAL victims in the “Amen” pew of the second debate for Bill and Hillary, and daughter to look at. . . BLACKJACK! The destruction of what was known as the republican party is now complete, and do you not think more than a few democrats noticed that. People are waking up to the fact that “parties” cannot fight the pendulum.

This country was founded upon a constitution that was designed for precisely this purpose, to disenfranchise power brokers and empower We The People, without a bloody revolution. That's why people like Hillary want to “amend” the constitution so bad. It stands in the way of their agenda. They know gun control won't work, but the second amendment is a test. If they can change that, why shucks, freedom of speech, religion, the press. . . will be easy peasy. If you want to see the hidden vote just go to Facebook and check out “likes” and “shares” on Donald Trump's live feeds vs Hillary's. BLACKJACK! Now, I may be wrong, but in my opinion on November 8th BOTH parties will be licking their wounds, and from the ashes of the old guard organizations such as the Libertarian Party, and even independents will begin to be taken a tad bit more seriously. BLACKJACK!



Sunday, October 23, 2016

My Baby MaMa





                                                                      My Baby MaMa. Let that soak in for a minute, will you? When I returned from California five years ago, I heard that term for the first time. It really put me back. I'm old school, you see. There’s wives, girlfriends, and mistresses. A girl friend was usually promoted to a wife if things turned out right. After you got  married, if you had  a girlfriend that's just plain ol’ cheating, unless, of course you're rich, then it's a mistress, adding some sort of legitimacy to it. There were levels of intimacy,  from having this person on the side for years all the way down to stealing a kiss, but If the woman tells then Donald Trump will sue her,  I digress.


Then, there's “My Baby MaMa.” Now leaving the “s” off of the word “baby” is not a typo. That's the way it usually rolls out of this filth’s mouth because the man uttering the term is so morally bankrupt he for one, admits he's a cheat, and two he's a deadbeat dad. I know that somewhere there are men who will support their illegitimate children, but whenever you see the dropped “s” that's usually a pretty good indication of the bankrupt deadbeatery of the speaker thereof. And they get MAD when you laugh!

Folks, this is what's wrong with our society. There is now an official term that legitimatizes adultery. And that's what it really is, adultery. When you remind the person who's stupid enough to utter such a phrase of that word they REALLY get mad. Now they don't get upset at cheating, or never contributing one red cent to the child, indeed, I met one guy who was PROUD his ex had married a man who raised his offspring so he could continue to have more “Baby MaMas” unimpeded by any responsibility whatsoever. No, they get bent out of shape when you show the same disrespect that THEY have shown toward the woman caught in an adulterous situation.

At first it amused me, but then it angered me. I know, I know, we shouldn't judge, but after raising four boys, and two sets of grandchildren, I just can't get my mind around “My Baby MaMa!” I'm just a simple ol’ boy from Austin, but this is the ultimate disrespect toward women. This reduces women to the role of cattle. They're only good for a use similar to a blow up party doll, and the result isn't even worth your name, much less your moral or financial support because “My Baby MaMa” will trudge on somehow. Maybe she’ll get lucky and meet a MAN!

The kids are NOT alright. Remember that article a couple days back? Mama’s baby grows up in this world, perhaps even being taught to show respect for “Real Daddy.” That's another term I hate. You marry a girl, clean her up, raise her kid just like your own, and have to hear the term “Real Daddy” come out of the child’s mouth almost as soon as they can say it. MaMa babies grow up with Real Daddy, and soon figure out the circumstances of their birth, watch Teen Titans, and some chick twerking across a stage, and you wonder why the Muslims call us the Great Satan!

This situation is not going to turn on a dime. This generation must be consumed before sanity returns, and I'm not talking about OUR generation, I'm talking about MaMa baby crawling across the floor right now! Do you see the far reaching ramifications of this mess? An entire generation who doesn't know that a man and a woman, that's right, ONE man, and  ONE WOMAN should get MARRIED, have a baby and raise it in a HOME with a mommy and daddy and FAMILY! I actually had a woman, full grown woman, tell me that adultery is where the other woman gets pregnant. Rave on baby, hell ain't HALF full! Then, I turn on the news, find that some porn star is claiming Trump kissed her without permission, and then offered her money. She's standing up there beside this lawyer like she's got good sense. A porn star! Oh, my bad, Adult Film Star. Didn't see THAT category on the Oscars. Ok, folks, I'm gonna boil that down for you. That would be a whore. Allegedly, Donald Trump at some point in history stole a kiss from her,  then offered to pay her for it, and she got mad! That's what you do with a whore. You pay her. The problem is that MaMa baby is already screwed up mentally, and THIS is being puked out on national TV! These people are being portrayed as role models. I mean, she has a lawyer, right . . . RIGHT?

Usually, I end an article with a solution, but I'm still working on this one. We’ve got a whole generation of MaMa Babies growing up, and they will VOTE some day. They will fornicate, commit adultery, dodge their responsibilities, and abort so many babies it'll make Hitler blush with shame. And then something like Hillary will come tripping along and they will seal the deal by putting her in the office that Abraham Lincoln graced. I swear, if Hillary wins I'm never going back to America. I'm just going to stay in Texas. This kids are not alright and it's our obligation to fix them. Teach them what good is. Teach them words like “adultery” and tell them that men who say things like “My Baby MaMa” are NOT men. They should be in line for corrective surgery, and I think you know what I'm talking about. Maybe one day we’ll again see a man introduce a woman by saying, “This is my wife, and the mother of my children." God save My Baby MaMa, and God DAMN the man who relegated her to that status!

Thursday, October 20, 2016

The Kids are NOT Alright

Are the kids alright? We’ve all been there. A parent’s number one priority is the safety, and well being of their children. We trust our kids to teachers, doctors, and sitters. You go out for the evening, and hire Suzie Sweetcheeks, head cheerleader at the high school, Girl Scout, lead in the school play, member in good standing at the church, and still, somewhere between the salad and the main dish you feel compelled to make that phone call for no logical reason, “Are the kids alright?”

Everything we do, as parents, is targeted toward our children being equipped to take on life, and hoping we can leave them a life worth taking on. We trust the people we elect, and put in charge to be of the same mind. A JFK, instituting a physical education mandate in order to give them healthy bodies, a school program to give them healthy minds, and clergy to help them get through the trials of puberty. The kids look up to us, and the people we put in charge, and kids start with a blank slate. What is written on that slate has many authors.

Imagine, if you will, Mohammed Ali stepping into the ring to face Joe Frazier, only instead of “Everlasting” gracing the back of their robes you see “Texaco” and “Exxon.” Now, imagine Hillary, and Trump stepping onto the debate stage, only they have robes, too, Hillary’s reading “BLS Investments” and Trump sports one reading “Thomas Barrack.” In this corner, former Senator, Secretary of State, the Terror of Benghazi, Hillary Clintoooooooooooon! And in this corner, entrepreneur, real estate mogul, heart throb of millions of women, with more money than God, Donald Truuuuuuuuuuump! Get ready to RUUUUUUMBLE!!!!!!!  THIS is where your country is, folks. THESE are the people setting the bar for your children’s future. Not as painful as sitting on a bicycle without a seat, but right up there in the top five.

Words mean things because words dictate actions. Almost all serial rapists begin their career as peeping Toms. If you led a decent life, never a thought about doing anything out of the way, but were put in a situation where you had an opportunity to do something completely out of character, you'd have to at least think about it before acting, but what if you were bombarded with thoughts all through your developmental years, and believed that such deviant actions were normal, acceptable. Kids look up to political leaders, rappers, the old man on the street, and they look for direction. And it's a double edged sword. The little boy who “grabs” combined with the little girl, who while being repulsed, believes it to be normal to BE grabbed because someone with the twelve sacred stones on their holy robe  said so, and she just endures because that's the world WE gave her.

From the rapper singing about “ Throwing up in his Ho’s cup” to candidates talking about grabbing, to those  saying “What does it matter” when questioned aboutthe deaths of patriots, , the world has become a Mad Maxx movie with hundreds of sequels, and your kids will raise your grandkids. The corporate backers of everything from gangsta-rappers to presidential candidates could care less about your children so long as the bottom line is always there. THEY live in gated communities with lots of guns. YOU, and your kids live in the world THEY created, and YOU  voted for. So, have dinner, enjoy the evening, make that call . . . the kids are NOT alright!

Tuesday, October 18, 2016

When The Kids Grow Up

When the kids grow up there will be a different world. Ted witnessed something recently. He has a neighbor who is a staunch republican. As usual, the Trump signs went up, and his yard became a political statement recently. Ted heard the voices of two boys over the fence, laughing hysterically, and he leaned closer. What was so funny was they were laughing about the conversation on that bus many years ago. They were around twelve years old. A girl of approximately the same age came to them, and reminded them that “grandpa” didn't like them talking about that, and would be very angry if he heard it, to which one boy said, “Shut up, or I'll grab you by the . . .”

When I was growing up in Shreveport, watching Disney on Sunday night, I didn't know Tinkerbelle even HAD one of those things. I thought everything was smooth “down there” and after sneaking a peak at a Barbie doll I found this to be true. I was attracted to little girls, but for the life of me I didn't know why. I guess that's why I'm a “face man” to this day.

Now, I'm not backing off my political stance one inch. Hillary is a crap bomb about to be dropped on the White House, and among ADULTS Trump’s statement can be analyzed, talked about, and homogenized till hell freezes over. Only one problem; the kids heard it, too! The seed has now been planted, and in twenty years we will all be hanging from the mighty oak that springs forth. In forty years . . . well, you're not going to believe. You WILL see that it is possible for a ten year old can birth a child.

The problem is that we, as conservatives, are so sick and tired of Bruce Gender, transgender bathrooms, black lives mattering, and EVERYTHING Muslim that we’ll accept any solution because the alternative is unthinkable. Division is the rule of the day. “Them against Us.” In spite of the spin that the election is rigged, the results will show the true color of our national character. Whatever comes out it, that's what America really is. Like it, love it, leave it, but what about when the kids grow up?

You can't undo this, folks. The die has been cast. Young, inquiring minds will explore just what that was that was being grabbed, and it's exciting. Do you remember your first kiss? I do. It was Pam Burns, under a slide in a park when I was thirteen years old. Now, I didn't grab her, but I couldn't stop kissing her. I remember this over a half century later (my God, she's gotta be a grandmother now) and it was only a peck! Can you imagine a full blown groping experience at thirteen, or twelve, or TEN!

Times they are a changing. The snobbish men's club on Capitol Hill is about to get a heads up. Hillary represents all that is wrong with government. She is the end product of Gerald Ford’s pardon of Richard Nixon, where the standard was set that no matter what the plutocracy does, they always have a “get out of jail free” card, and good, Christian conservatives will put up with almost anything in order to end it, even letting Donald Trump lead Incitatus into the senate chamber! But, just  wait ‘till the kids grow up!

Saturday, October 15, 2016

Pussy By Any Other Name is Still Just a Cat

THIS ARTICLE CONTAINS CONTENT THAT MAY BE OFFENSIVE TO SOME READERS. READER DISCRETION IS ADVISED.

I had a dream last night. I dreamed I was on a bus. And the bus was glorious. And it was silver, and inlaid with gold, within and without, and I heard a voice call unto me, and the voice said, “Pssssssst!”

So I walked up to the voice, and I said, “What?” And the voice got holy, and powerful, and resounded-duh.

And the voice said, “Now, I'm gonna tell you about pussy!”

“Back in the day your government declared a war on poverty. Now forty percent of your nation is on food stamps. Then, it declared a war on drugs. Now you got the cartels. Bigger than IBM. Bigger than ATT. Production lines better than Apple Computer, more potent than Johnson and Johnson . . . can I have an amen?”

“ Now, pussy has been brought out of the back of the bus, and  your government has declared a war on pussy. Heretofore America had forgotten pussy, swept it under the rug, but now, pussy is in every mind, on every lip. If we can expect the same result as before, your government will expand this war on pussy. Indeed, the groundwork has been prepared with gay marriage, transgender restrooms, and sex education in elementary schools. You will see a concentrated effort to eradicate pussy.

If we have learned anything it's when the government tries to fix something it costs too much, and in the end the problem grows exponentially. If the government model holds true in  short order the nation will be overflowing with pussy, and men will not be judged by the content of their character, but by pussy,  and all, except those paying child support, will cry, “Free at last! Free at last! Thank God pussy is free at last! Give me an amen, and pass the love offering!”

See how absolutely silly this is. For days now I've been snake amazed at the democrats trying to milk this so-called “scandal” for all it’s worth. We have seen a homosexual grill Donald Trump on this during the last debate while Bill Clinton stares at his victims in the audience. Michelle Obama almost in tears, saying she was so offended that she couldn't quit thinking about it. Funny, she wasn't offended by the last rappers in the White House.

And Hillary! Don't get me started. CAUGHT! Caught deleting emails, government property. Goes on and on about Trump’s tax returns while she has a foundation formed in CANADA that launders money better than Al Capone, sold favors while she was Secretary of State, and the democrats are STILL waving her around like Betsy Ross.

Last year I wrote a piece called “America Lost!” I need to edit it and call it America GONE! Do you realize that around fifty percent of the voters in America think Hillary Clinton is a viable candidate? She brags about her successful nuclear deal with Russia. Putin KEPT his word, Hillary lied, and he called her a liar. Wanna know what the whole Syrian thing is really about? For weeks the Dems have been hammering that nail about Trump being unstable. Now, as usual, they wave the specter of WWIII at us with “stable” Hillary at the helm.

This ain't gonna work. There isn't enough room in the stadiums to hold all,the Trump supporters, and the democrats can’t dig up enough dead voters to steal the election. So please, get out and vote! Make America great again. We can all worry about “pussy” later!

Tuesday, October 11, 2016

Lyin' Flyin' Ryan

Flyin’ Lyin’ and Ryan. Y'all must understand that I'm still figuring out this politics thing. When I came upon  “Nookiegate” I took my usual Texas slant and dismissed it, but when Paul Ryan did his little maneuver I tried to understand that he was just trying to salvage the republican majority. Well, Paul Ryan is a lying sack of crap. Am I being vague here? Now this is complicated, but I'm going to lay it out for you.

The republican establishment has never liked Donald Trump. They fought him tooth and nail as he kicked and clawed his way to the nomination. Ryan hid in a bathroom until he reluctantly endorsed the OVERWHELMING candidate, and then did nothing else. All the while, he, and that rat pack that defected yesterday schemed and planned what to do about Donald Trump. They were willing to throw the entire election over to Hillary, but Donald Trump must go!

I'll admit that after watching the polls over the weekend I thought Trump had been dealt a death blow. Then I dug a little deeper and looked at the numbers. First off there’s always the question of who “won” the debate. Now, debates ain't like a boxing match. You know, where one guy is on the mat, sucking snot, and the other is dancing around. Debates are subjective. With both parties still standing at the end the crowd will always believe THEIR guy won. I mean, he's still standing, isn't he?

CNN had the audacity to admit their poll was primarily democrats. The touted those numbers constantly, oh that and the little clip where Trump says he's gonna put Hillary in jail, they were proud of that too. Hillary stood there, swatting flies, and leaning on her chair, and Bill tried to avoid looking at the ladies he'd assaulted. What has fueled the Trump Train is the fact that us “deplorables” are fed up. I was genuinely concerned with the women voters, but as I took my own poll, read comments, and considered, I began to see that the image of those abused women sitting there at the debate spoke louder than all the locker room jokes on that bus ever could. Women are fed up, too!

Now, let's go back. The republican establishment has never supported Donald Trump. Trump has used them for what they're good for, but his entire “put togethers” has been the fact that he's not beholden to anyone except the American people, and Paul Ryan can't stand that. See the hypocrisy here? Isn't the speaker of the house supposed to be obliged to the American people, too? I'm confused. Scott Binsack isn't confused

. https://www.facebook.com/scott.binsacksr/videos/1222479917809504/

It seems that Ryan was somewhere mixed up in the release of Nookiegate. In a two prong attack he tried to derail the Trump Train, and keep his political machine in working order even if it means working with President Hillary Clinton. Trump has began to recover. People are seeing through the farce and marching steadily toward November 8.

I am learning this game. What I'm seeing is these RINOs are NOT representative of anything except their own interests. It doesn't matter is there's a little “r” behind their name, they're just a bunch of high flyin’ Ryans with a little “d” hid off somewhere. When Paul Ryan pulled his little stunt yesterday he played right into Donald Trump’s hands, exposing himself for why he really was, and effectively finalizing the divorce between the American People and the Republican Party.  Kinda like the garbage taking itself to the road.

Monday, October 10, 2016

Poopy Man

Well, we got to watch the face off between the wicked witch of the east and poopy man last night. I watched  the debate on CNN,, and made the mistake of continuing to listen to the commentary afterwards. The debate was wild, but the gymnastics of the reporters after was incredible. Ok, I get it, Trump said a dirty word. With women being a “yuge” voting block this may be the joker in the deck that gives Hillary a straight flush. CNN isn't going to let this go.

I've seen in the past the way CNN slants, insinuates, and enters into the debate itself, cloaked as moderating. They do this when they have no basis. I have to admit this “locker room” thing does have some meat, and CNN is going to  sauté it with garlic and onions. Let's get down to the bottom line.

American politics stinks. Last night revealed that we have hit a new low. Clinton HAS took a hammer to her server. She DID roll over and go back to sleep as Benghazi fell. She DID cover for Bill’s exploits in the White House, and she DIDN’T divorce him. Trump DID make jokes about grabbing women “down there” against their will. Now, I'm going to be candid with you, and you may be surprised. Because of the songs I've recorded, I have a terrible reputation among people who've never met me. I'm sixty-five years old and I have never grabbed a woman like that. My mother told me if I ever showed disrespect to a lady she’d beat me with an iron skillet. Mom’s gone, but I still have the skillet.  When someone makes a statement that if you have enough money you can do whatever you want to women it should give you pause.

Words mean things. When you hear someone orally fantasize about such things you must ask yourself where the base line is? Was it pure fantasy or was there a little wishful thinking, or even an action somewhere in the past? The final result is we now have a campaign between two people that really nobody wants. Democrats cannot get past those emails, and republicans can't get out of that bus! It almost makes a third term for Obama enticing.

I don't think this crisis is going to be easy on Donald. He's a fighter. He will fight until the end. Hillary already has a TV ad up using clips from last night. His campaign was slipping since the first debate. I noticed the poll numbers turn around. From the moment Trump announced his run he has clawed his way up the ladder. Always up. When he won the nomination it lent legitimacy to his candidacy. Last week’s downturn marked the first time the Trump Train seemed to be running out of steam. The release of the private tape came at exactly the right time to emphasize this, and the herd of republican congressmen running for the door only served to emphasize the enormity of the effect on the republican lunge for the White House.

The campaign is reduced to a mud fight. Trump slings, Clinton tries to be coy, and slings back. It's similar to a scene from the remake of the movie, “Vacation” where the family finds itself swimming in a sewer thinking it’s the hot springs. As the mud slinging continues it'll come down to which candidate doesn't stink as bad. . There is much speculation about who will win, and who will lose, but I'm reminded of an old Paul Simon tune.

Going to the candidates’ debate
Laugh about it, talk about it
When it's time to choose
Every way you look at it, you lose

Sunday, October 9, 2016

Donald Trump Likes Women

News flash! Donald Trump likes women! In a world with things like Bruce Gender, isn't that refreshing? He thinks his daughter is the most beautiful girl in the world. Attracted to his wife, too. When he's around a bunch of guys he talks like a guy. Gosh, I haven't found anything I don't like about him yet.

The political correctness movement has put America into a state that makes people believe that is is an obligation not to offend anyone in even the slightest way. That is an impossible task. In a world filled with conflicting opinions you will always offend someone, or you, yourself will be offended. You cannot avoid it.

The people who inflict this model on the rest of us themselves think nothing about stating the absurd, such as hailing a transvestite as an American hero, while making it the lead story on CNN that Trump behaves like a man in private. This is not newsworthy, people. I listened to the tape. I didn't hear a thing that I haven't heard in private conversations among politicians, law enforcement, even clergy. I, myself tool a little lewd jab in my last article. I'm sure SOMEone was offended. I'm sorry. I like to touch women. Women like to be touched . . . politely.

With Yoko Ono ADMITTING she had a date with Hillary, and CNN can't find anything on Donald Trump except he thinks his daughter is cute and he's attracted to women? Bill Clinton had so many girlfriends you'd have thought Hillary wasn't the First Lady, she was a madam! The democrats hope this is the end of the Trump Train, but they're wrong. Anyone with common sense will know this isn't that big of a deal.

Trump apologized for his private words. Why'd he even bother? This article is difficult to write because the subject is such a nothing story. When I first heard it I supposed Trump must have let loose a string of obscene words and suggestions, but when I finally got around to actually listening to the conversation it was mundane. Fact is, Donald Trump has never forcibly raped anyone to my knowledge. Didn't we have a president who was a master at that? What was his name? I think his wife is running for president now.

We’ll have to wait and see how this affects the debate. There is one positive thing that came out of this. All the politicians who turned on the republican nominee have shown a spineless nature. The prospect of Hillary in the White House is far worse than a little locker room chatter eleven years ago. The republicans falling back seemed to have forgotten all about that. The state of the nation means nothing to them. Donald Trump said a dirty word. These people didn't change, folks. They are who they've always been, and our government, and nation means nothing to them. And they run the country! These are the people who let thousands of Syrians into the country, while poking fun at Trump’s wall. Hillary covered for her husband’s sexual behavior for years while considering half  the country as “deplorable.”

Take a good, long look at this desperate attempt to shore up Hillary. Only time will tell if this is a deal killer. The spin doctors will crank it up. How Trump handles it will prove his ability. He can't just quit. The bad thing is that he may come out trying to sling more mud than Hillary, and that's no good. How will that solve our problems? I just read an article on The Slate (www.slate.com) that was titled “Never Forget That Donald Trump Could Have Been the President of the United States.” The writer said that the Trump candidacy had exposed the ugly side of America that had been hidden for years. He condemned half of us. The truth is the country is sick of Bruce Gender, the president bowing to Arab kings, and other nations taking our business, jobs and pride. We just didn't think we could do anything about it until now, but, Donald Trump likes women.

Thursday, October 6, 2016

God I Miss Granny Clampett

God I miss Granny Clampett! She was the old lady on the Beverly Hillbillies was famous for cooking up concoctions out by the “cement pond.” Everything from “possum” to “shine” came rolling out. Back then it was funny because everyone just knew nobody really did that. All but the folks in Louisiana where I was born, who were eagerly hoping to pick up a few tips from Granny.. Back in the day food bought in a store or café was pretty much the same as anywhere else. The green beans weren't all that green, the corn, well, it was purt near white! See, what they did was cook the food up and then just can it as is, just like folks did at home, only the can was prettier, and it was supposed that the food companies had a tad more on the ball than Granny sheerly from volume. Volume. Write that down.

There are several factors to be considered when producing food for the masses. When Ora Jean took her honey to the store in Ding Dong, Texas she gave it to the owner, who put it on the shelf, and most likely when Ora Jean came back next week to pick up her money all the honey would be gone. She dropped off five more jars and went shopping. That little store in Ding Dong would probably fit quite well in the rest room of HEB, the Goliath supermarket a lot of Texans depend on for their daily bread. HEB runs the home spun ads showing some guy growing green beans, a few family around him, and of course, the obligatory daughter. Always ends with, “This is such and such department at HEB.” A shack, two tractors, and a girl in faded jeans. If you buy that have I got a bridge for you, and it's on isle five!

Now I'm just picking on HEB because I can see one from here. Walmart is just as bad. They'd sell you rat tails for toothpicks if they thought they could get away with it. Both corporate enterprises contend with the same problem. Ora Jean died a long time ago, and the bees all flew off.. Enter Chinese businessman, Won Hung Lo. Won has a LOT of honey. Well, mostly honey, and therein is the problem. He's not dropping off five jars of honey, he's dropping off five OIL TANKERS full. Won, HEB, and Wally World all have to do the math. How much honey should they put on the shelves, how long can they afford it to sit there, and last, but not least, how can they make the honey for NOTHING and sell it for SOMETHING?

Shelf life is very important. If you can find a way to keep something fresh then you extend shelf life. You could probably buy a Big Mac today, and Jesus can eat it when He returns. Driving down costs is important, too. Why have one hundred percent honey when a mixture of honey and vegetable oil will taste pretty much the same. And one hundred percent pure beef. Sure. Flank, skirt, loin, eyeballs, tongue, private parts and noses. Hey! It's one hundred percent pure beef, right? All coming from the Billy Joe Jim Bob beef department at HEB. Won is Billy Joe on steroids.

If you read ingredients you will be overwhelmed. I have a simple rule. If I can't pronounce it, or it has more than two syllables I don't eat it. Added water? That's cool. That's just the butcher sneaking his thumb on the scale. Salt, i.e. Sodium, well, it's kinda natural, but next time you're in the store check out the amounts in a pound of “one hundred percent” ground beef compared to the pre-pressed patties you buy because you're too lazy to mash up your own. Then we progress all the way up to MonoTookItOutOfMyButtAndStuckItInYourMouth preservatives “to maintain freshness.” Wanna know how much of this stuff is out there? An undertaker friend of mine once told me when he entered the profession there were times where a funeral was delayed, and he worked hard to keep mama fresh. Now, due to additives and preservatives, a lot of bodies arrive pre-pickled. I Crappith Thee NOT!

Another thing is boxed food. Don't even read the label. Just eat the box. It's better for you. You know according to the FDA, Legos are fit for human consumption. Stop laughing. How do those chicken nuggets taste? Boxed food lasts a LONG time, and I mean a LOOOOONG time. Ever notice how the roaches always seem to linger on the box and not the macaroni inside? Jus Sayin. I think the boxed food craze began with all the “helper” things. Hamburger Helper, Tuna Helper, and a favorite in Arkansas, POSSUM HELPER! Read the ingredients. If you can't scrounge up some meat, a little garlic, macaroni, tomato sauce, and some cheese, you deserve that bathroom break in the morning. There's nothing magic in that box, except it may make it easier for my buddy the undertaker.

Save your fork, here comes the good part. FAST FOOD! There is no such thing as fast food. SOMEbody has to knock that cow in the head, and grind up them eyeballs so they can hand you that In and Out burger, ok? That is NOT the burger your mama made, you know, the one,with the bell peppers hanging out the side. And fast food scandals abound. What is amazing is what we can eat and not drop dead. Well, at least not right then, anyway.

I love chicken wings. It's more of a social even than a meal. In Texas it becomes a challenge to produce a wing that is so hot you can light a cigarette with it. Along came Won. The problem with chicken wings is there ain't much chicken on a wing. Hell, it's just beer food anyway, who’s worried. Millineums, THAT’S who’s worried. They can't be gnawing around some stupid bone, and they're smoking pot anyway. Make the wings a nugget of another shape. Wait! Cost. Them chickens cost “X” and how do you mix an additive to a wing? Well, with a bone in wing you can't, and  the cost of de-boning all them wings, grinding up the meat, and at least TRYING to shape them like a wing . . .well, as you can plainly see, we have what's called a cost issue right away. Ah So! . Just gotta find a replacement that is similar to chicken. Oh, did I tell you that about a million pounds of rat meat, shaped like chicken wings turned up coming in from China. Now, I don't know if there’s any connection, but it just so happens that right after that, Sonic had those two guys in the car on their commercial advertising a two for one sale on, you guessed it . . . BONELESS CHICKEN WINGS! What's wrong with you? Rats? They taste just like chicken.

Mexican food is a big part of the Texas scene. Well, it's not really Mexican food, it something called “Tex-Mex” which is our way of ripping off someone's culture and calling it our own, but down here even babies eat tacos. This style of food is easy to make, tastes great, and basically won't really hurt you, all but the morning toilette, but BE A MAN! Well, wouldn't you know it. You get a bunch of Yankees involved with something that costs next to nothing, and they'll come up with a way to make it cost nothing. You do this because the primary ingredient in this cuisine is that one hundred percent pure ground beef we talked about earlier. Seems that Taco Bell was blending in a little silicon to “beef up” the taco. Their CEO even confirmed it, saying it had been FDA approved, and was safe for human consumption. In fact, it was he same type of silicon used safely for years in breast implants. Now, I'm just a simple ol’ boy from Austin, but I prefer my titties ala carte! God I miss Granny Clampett. ,,

Tuesday, October 4, 2016

Immunity

Immunity in criminal cases is used to get facts from participants who are not the target of the investigation in order to prosecute the perpetrator of the original crime. Write that down, there's gonna be a quiz later. Let's look at a situation. HomeBoy shoots his connection from a car in some back alley in Ferguson, Missouri. Yeah, I know, I'm a racist, just deal with it and let's move on. So, the cops bring in HomeBoy, and the driver and start sweating them. HomeBoy ain't saying nuttin. Cops notice that the driver is a bit perturbed over the possibility of being Bubba’s boyfriend for the next twenty-five years to life, so they begin to rub it in. Bring him a Coke, but he notices a little jar of Vaseline on the table. After a while the subject zeros in on his involvement with the shooting, mix in a little “good cop, bad cop” and an offer is made. If he rolls over on HomeBoy, not only will they let him walk out the door, they're gonna buy him a ham sandwich, and give back his car. This is called “immunity.”

Now, I give you a second case. HomeGirl sets up a server for emails. Nothing wrong with that, ‘cept this HomeGirl has a very sensitive job in the State Department, and the server is about as secure as the chats between the proverbial thirteen year old girl and the perv sitting in that kitchen watching Chris Hansen walk in. “What are you doing here, Madam Secretary?” Well, as luck work would have it the fertilizer hits the fan and everybody’s butt is on the table. There are five particular butts who have intimate knowledge of this event. But, there is a new wrinkle in the blanket. These five know they will be questioned, and they know they are involved. Do they wait until the hammer is about to fall? Why heck no! They strike an immunity deal before the first question is ever asked. The immunity is so universal that in the end the cops call a press conference and tell everyone, “Nothing to see here, just keep moving!”

Now, I'm just a Simple Ol’ Boy From Austin, but did I miss something here? Thirty-Three THOUSAND emails in a server that was so insecure Russian children are studying them to learn English! I Crappith Thee NOT! A State Department that was so flabber-mouth it announced the arrival of an ambassador so ISIS would be there on time. A candidate that is so devious she crawls to her SUV and the press is told she dropped a contact. Nothing to see here, just move on. And her “evidence” on her opponent? He doesn't like fat chicks, and files taxes like a billionaire.

There is no clean end of a turd. The scary part is that about fifty percent of the voting public, not counting the deceased, of course, think she's the greatest thing since sliced bread! If Hillary wins you don't have to leave the country, the country will have left YOU! Go to Mexico. It'll be empty. Start a new life there.

This is the most decisive election in American history. It's almost as if God, Himself set it up as a test for us to show who we really are, and if we fail the test, we get Hillary, and Bill, and Chelsea, and El Chapo, and Ali Babba! Black lives won't matter, white lives won't matter, NO lives will matter. Hmmm, maybe we can all get “immunity.”

Sunday, October 2, 2016

The Case of Jonbenet Ramsey

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Sherlock Holmes said that when you rule out the impossible, what remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth. So it is with the case of JonBenet Ramsey. As we peel the opinion the core becomes obvious. Just like my study of the death of JFK, this case begins to demonstrate facts. In that case I proved that indeed Lee Harvey Oswald did fire the shots, up to, and including a blown up picture done on my iPhone literally showing him in the window wearing the same T-Shirt that he was subsequently arrested in. The remaining question is who put him in that window. Just getting past all the grassy knoll nonsense puts us closer to that finding. When you stop looking for straw man, and look for real men, the dots become much easier to connect.

In the JonBenet case the crime scene wasn't secure. The police ventured several explanations. It was a holiday and they were understaffed. What started out to be a kidnapping became a homicide, at which time they DID secure the area, after asking all the friends and pizza delivery people to leave of course. Even the simplest understanding of the situation shows the flaws here. Six year old beauty queen is missing. The house IS a crime scene. Where did she go, how did she go, and is she maybe still in the house. Police officers trained to sniff out less than a gram of dope missed an entire body in the basement of all places, the body being found by the father.

And what about where the house was? When one reads about the wealth, and position of the family, one would surmise that the home was in an upscale neighborhood. This was not the case. While the Ramseys didn't live in “the hood” they did have at least thirty eight neighbors within two miles who were registered sex offenders. Come to think of it I don't think the hood is that bad. Now, we’ve got this little girl, who looks like a movie star, parading all over the state in beauty pageants with whoEVER in the audience. The Ramseys did NOT live in Neverland, and there WAS no real security. They were secure in their own delusion. That's why John Ramsey puts his little girl to bed, and doesn't give her a second thought until the next morning. If you will note there was no statement saying either parent “checked the kids” before turning in.

Now, let's burn those straw men down. Nothing, either before, or since has ever shown John, Patsy or Burke Ramsey to be a violent, deranged pedophile, and folks, these guys don't find Jesus, they just keep petting them files until they get caught. John and Patsy didn't kill their daughter, they didn't even CHECK her before going to bed! Basic DNA ruled all them out. No shooter on the grassy knoll. It HAD to be an intruder.

The famous cobwebs on the basement window. Since we know the window was compromised, and we know the little girl ended up dead in the basement we know that the basement window had to be the point of entry. Perhaps the Boulder police need to clear the cobwebs out of their heads first, and then worry about the ones on the window.

How did she get to the basement without alerting the family? Tape on the mouth. Simple as that. You don't have to stun gun a six year old girl. Just close her mouth and manhandle her downstairs. Helps if you knock her in the head along the way. The means of death. She is stunned but still alive. When the intruder finishes with her he dispatches her in that fashion. He didn't want her to remember him JonBenet was quick. She would have fingered him quicker than a Happy Meal at a McDonalds.

So, who done it? The man who killed JonBenet Ramsey knew the house. He didn't go looking. He knew the path to the most remote part of the house i.e. The corner of the basement near the window that he came in from. These guys have patterns. He'd done something like this before. He's probably done it since. Thirty-eight of them within two miles. The little girl did a little show at a local mall right before her death, people all over the house during the Christmas season, and he's one of them. Even if the police checked them all out they missed him. They missed the body, too, go figure.

So, how'd it go so wrong? Police, like a lot of professionals have theories they hold to. Theories such as a wife who claims her husband shot himself while in bed. Simple. Husband dead in the bed, wife did it. “We always focus on family first!” Even when it makes absolutely no sense at all, and the evidence of the real killer is being degraded. They were looking at the grassy knoll!

Eventually, because the DNA from her panties and pajamas, JonBenet’s killer will be found. It will amaze everyone, and the crime of the century will turn out to be so simple you will not believe it.

Duct Tape

I was having coffee, glanced at my little table, and had a brilliant freaking thought! As you know, if you read my article, “Why” today, I was expounding the death of JonBenet. Well, I also have been watching endless episodes of “The First 48,” where homicide detectives work feverishly to develop a lead within the first forty-eight hours or their chances of solving the crime will diminish by as much as fifty percent! I noticed a common factor. The same common factor I saw in another series, “Forensic Files.” This evidence was plain in the JonBenet case. I'm surprised that our legislatures haven't noticed it, it was there in plain sight, as I reached for my coffee it hit me. Right there on my table. DUCT TAPE! Nearly all women killed come into contact with duct tape. There is even forensics developed to analyze duct tape. When and where it was made, how sticky is is, or isn't, and ways to lift DNA and fingerprints specifically from duct tape. I Crappith Thee NOT! Google it!

So, I don't know the exact statistics, but I'd be willing to guess that if we could enact Duct Tape Control, we could reduce death to women by at least eighty percent! Forget gun control. Guns don't kill people, DUCT TAPE kills people! Now, admittedly, there are some women who need duct tape, at least on their mouth, certain presidential candidates come to mind, in addition to Mothers Against The Second Amendment, but can't you see? If a maniac cannot buy duct tape the odds of him (or her) being able to commit the crime will be greatly reduced..

Of course there will always be certain people who either have duct tape, or can get it on the black market, so that's the more reason all duct tape should be REGISTERED! Anyone on a “No-Fly” list should be banned from ever purchasing duct tape. Just imagine all the women who'd still be with us if we'd only taken duct tape out of the hands of depraved people.

I know that some states, such as California and Colorado will most likely legalize duct tape within their borders for medical purposes, sex therapy comes to mind, and there will still be duct tape use south of the border. God knows the Cartels use a LOT of duct tape, but if we can just regulate  use of it on a wide scale for law abiding citizens the murder rate will plummet! I should run for president, I really should! I'd be “Yuge!”

Why?

Why? That is the biggest, most profound question in human existence. Why? We see the unexplainable, the horrific, the soul searing, and stare up at the sky, asking, “Why?” You will wait until you're dust, pray until ice forms on your upraised palms, and never be able to comprehend, “Why?”

For the last week I've been studying the death of JonBenet. We’ll never understand the mind of the person who perpetrated the act, indeed, if we understand, then we are as depraved as that person was. No, the why here is why does it make any difference after twenty years. On this I can enlighten you. It makes a difference because the death of that little girl stole not only her life and innocence, but ours as well. We all wish that life were beautiful, and Shirley Temple was forever singing “The Good Ship Lolly Pop,” but JonBenet’s  death reminded us that the ship ran aground that day, and we were forced to look at the crumpled body of our dreams on a basement floor.

I noticed that as I watched documentary after documentary I began to focus more and more on the beautiful, and less on the basement floor. I was absolutely stunned at the talent in that little body, and still asking, “Why?” It's as if God is using her death to teach us a bunch of lessons. God didn't make this happen, man has free will, but once it did happen He used it. He used it to show us what evil is, how we will always be exposed to it, and how we answer the “why” determines how we fight it. God also challenged our arrogance. For all the “trace DNA,” and national data bases, FBI, CIA, NSA, and gumshoes taking a magnifying glass to ever part of that house we will most likely never surely know what happened in that basement in 1996! God knows, and he waits at the Gate behind that big cash register in the sky to total up the bill. JonBenet will have an eternity of dancing with the Angels, and whomever killed her will dance with the devil.

Why? My six year old grandson got to go to school for the first time this year. All his life he got to watch his brothers and sister get on that big yellow bus, and ride off to a mysterious place that he wasn't allowed to go, and he longed for the day when he, too, will be a “big boy,” and take his place on that bus. I'm telling you this because I want you to understand that I feel the wonder, the joy, in a little boy’s mind on that day. My grandson was transformed, invigorated because it was a right of passage. On that day we stopped calling him “New Baby,” and called him by his name, Stevin! Out in Carolina there was another little six year old boy. I know he was just as thrilled to be a “big boy” too, and I know he loved his teachers, his lunch, his books, and the school ground . . . where he was shot while going to his school. He lingered for most of a week, and now he plays with JonBenet. Why?