When I go to the convienence store here in Big K, I have a check list. Money, check. Keys, check. Cigarettes, check. Gun . . .And therein, brothers and sisters, lies the problem! In order to carry a gun in Killeen one must be politically correct, but one must keep a wary eye on economics, too. Now, I don't have a license to carry. Not because I'm some criminal, I've taken the course, out shot everybody there, got all my ducks in a row, but, I'm lazy. I took one look at the form that I had to send into the state, with all the questions, and the fact that my driver's license had to match up, and, well, I just had a beer instead.
In Texas you can have a gun in your home or in your car. Well, I just did the math. I got attacked in my driveway (Me 1, HomeBoys 0) and going to the store after dark in Killeen, which, if you are sixty or so, and have a limp is a delightful experience. I didn't know I had so many friends until I came back to Killeen from Los Angeles. Every time I get out of my car somebody walks up to me and wants directions, to ask me something, needs a dollar, one of my cigarettes, or just wants to knock me in the head and drive away in my Mercedes. So, I figured that having a gun in the house, and one in the glove compartment would suit my needs just fine!
Now, here's the issue. Ask CJ what happens if you are caught carrying a gun by a cop down here. Well, they take your gun! Oh, of course, you will get it back...right, RIGHT? CJ got his back, didn't he? If you have suitable income, and a locker full of weapons this is a minor irritant, but if you're living on Social Security it becomes a major consideration. I have three guns. I have a beautiful
9mm Smith & Wesson, a brick heavy Hi-Point 9, and, of course, the obligatory 12 gauge shotgun for larger gatherings. I have an ample supply of ammunition, because in Killeen you just never know who's going to drop by.
My problem is, while I love the grace and beauty of my Smith, I really don't want Barney tripping down to the ol' PD with it should it go off. This is where economics comes into play. What's a HomeBoy worth. Should you give up a gun you put down several hundred dollars to acquire, or should you just just use one that you can replace from any pawn shot for a fraction of that cost? Decisions, decisions! So, I carry the Hi-point. It only has seven rounds, but, not being a cop, I figure that I'll only need one shot anyway, and I'm comfortable with the full knowledge that this gun is disposable. The cops will take it and I will probably NEVER see it again, and I'm cool with that.
But, all that having been said, I propose a fix. HOMEBOY tags! It would work like this. You get your carry license but with one new wrinkle. It would come with four little cardboard tags that, should you have to defend your life, while getting out of your car, you just tear one off, staple it to the ear of your attacker, and the police check to see if your tag is properly affixed, and they let you go your merry way. Of course, you can't, like, mount their heads, or anything like that, I mean we ARE civilized, right? In a town like Killeen I figure you'd have to renew your tags about once a year.
I think this would work out just fine. It would ease the economic pressure on old geezers like me, clean up the parking lots at the Valeros quite well, and would save the police all the trouble of keeping up with all those guns that they have no intention of returning, anyway. Am I out of line here? We must all do our part to get America back on the track of financial stability, and I'm proud to do my part.
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