Monday, July 13, 2015

Wetback!

     With political correctness, gender confusion, race mix-match and other factors, definitions and social acceptance have become important so we're a gonna have a class on social structure and linguistics, and since I'm a Texan liberals please take a break. What I'm about to say will not interest you. Take your grandson shopping for a dress at Macy's.  

     When I first heard the term, "Illegal Aliens" I immediately thought of Roswell. Hey, I'm not kidding. I conjured up mental images of big-headed creatures with spindly arms and legs, and LOTS of tin foil in the desert. Later, when someone said, "Undocumented workers" I naturally thought that was like a construction worker taking cash so he could avoid income tax. Slowly the truth became plain. These were new, more user friendly terms for a critter Texas has had for years. WETBACKS! 

     Boy, that hurts your ears, don't it libtards? Swat them bees, swat them bees! Until Donald Trump addressed the issue I did not know wetbacks were a political force in America. Silly me. In a country where a man can get on the cover of a magazine as a super model what do you expect? Wetbacks are out in force. Time was, if liberals wanted to show how fair and inclusive they were they'd invite a black guy to a party . . . one, just one, of course, so they could all sit around and discuss watermelons, and brag about how in inclusive they really were. Well, the new guy on the woodpile is a wetback! 

     And there are so many of them we have to have sanctuary cities. You know, like San Francisco. I thought that place was reserved for the gays, oh, my mistake, they lost that crown to Austin. I digress. Wetbackery is IN! I'm just waiting on Obama to take up the cause of the guy who killed that girl on the pier out in Frisco with something like, "If I had a son, he'd look like him." Obama is sympathetic to wetbacks because his back was just dried off in 2008! And wetbacks climbed immediately to the top of the tower of psycho-babble where even MENTIONING them is a social blunder. 

     Since Macy's has dumped Trump, you should expect to see new products soon. Plain brown pants and shirts, patent leather shoes, and of course, Vitalis is BACK! Then Miley Cyrus will pull out her two front teeth, dye her hair jet black and trade twerking for salsa. Black folk, you just better take a number, your day has come and gone. Pull down the statue of General Lee and replace it with Pancho Villa! Buy all the Chevrolet stock you can find, and teach your kids SPANISH! Wetback is the new black!

     Everything wetback is somehow MORE. Remember the Godfather? Now c'mon, admit it, those guys were really cool, weren't they? "I'm gonna make him an offer he can't refuse." Now get this; "I ain't even gonna lie to choo!" The term, "Mafia" almost became cuddly, but MEXICAN Mafia? Now THAT even makes the fat boys step back. America has embraced wetbackism. Now I don't know the translation, but Americans of Mexican decent are looking at all these gringos jumping on this and thinking, "WTF?" They KNOW wetbackery! 

     Hey, I'm not kidding. Think I am? Remember. when we had to come up with that immortal phrase, "The 'N' Word?" Then, all the sudden you couldn't go one day without hearing, "Nigga" come out of someone's mouth. Shucks, white chick up in Washington State even turned into a nigga. I'll bet if she examines her family roots she'll find a wetback in there somewhere. Of course she'll have to find a low cut dress, and straighten that hair out a bit. 

     Styles and modes come and go, and liberal culture stands at the ready to fall into quick step behind every fad that comes rolling out. This has opened a whole new list of options for me, personally. I've never been married to a Mexican girl, which is astounding because they are some of the most beautiful women in the world. You wouldn't know it because Univision won't run the Miss Universe contest, but they're pretty hot. Anyway, I'm gonna find me a little seƱorita and get remarried. Gotta buy a bigger house, though, cause she'll have "family!"

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