I am a creature of habit. Consequently, I live alone. I hate to admit that, but it's true. I get up the same time every morning. Don't need an alarm clock because I have a dog who pees. I set the coffee pot the night before so I don't have to think before my first smoke. I brush my teeth, and most mornings I shower, unless I'm tired, hung over, irritated, or have a good idea for an article, then I do a “spit bath” and go to the kitchen to meet the day. I've found that a good litmus test is if you can smell your feet you probably need a shower. Dog don't care. Shucks, she's a dog! Women should be more like dogs. Some are, actually, but I digress. Consequently, I live alone, which can suck at times, but it has its moments, and one of those moments is not having a chick to order you around in the morning before you can see. I love getting up in the morning and doing exactly what ---> I <--- want to do. The minute “she” makes you go to Starbucks instead of her going to the kitchen the negotiation of your freedom begins, and that night the return on investment is her headache. (Consequently, I live alone.)
Facebook now has this wonderful feature called “Memories.” As you know I write a bit, so my memories consist to a great degree of hundreds of previous articles, and since I've been under the scrutiny of publishers for quite some time now, I don't have to spell check much because I'm from Texas. I try not to “drill down” on any subject, flying high above the issues, and allowing my readers to form opinions on their own. Surprisingly I don't get much hate mail, unless you count that girl in India, but she's probably eating roaches anyway so what does she know? Anyway, I will look at the article a bit, and put it out there. I haven't been as widely read as I am now, so these pieces are new to some. Others who have seen them did so last year, two, or even three years ago, so the posting is nostalgic for them, or perhaps they didn't read it then, but do now. At any rate that gets the day rolling (and, again, I don't have to think much.)
I used to scan the news for ideas, but I've discovered that I can get more from talking with my dog so I gave that up, and I just check my mail. Ideas “cook” in my head. I honestly don't know where they come from, I just know that when one is done it pops out. Along about this time I get my morning call from Ted. Ted is my partner in this conspiracy, and he has more degrees than a thermometer, so he guides me toward a semblance of literacy, with is always a plus. He throws the ball, and I put it over the fence. I think I understand about every third word he says.
I don't get tied down by endless citing of facts. For one it’s boring. It bores me to write like that, and with my demographic of readers I KNOW it bores them, so I just don't do it. I try not to lie much, but I'm a Texan, and you know how we are. Hey, I've been married six times stand up Christian, so you know I can spin a yarn. Been run off so many times that I thought PMS meant
“Pack my stuff!” (Consequently, I live alone.) Everybody covers their butt, and no one looks into a mirror in the morning with an “S.O.B.” looking back.
I was a songwriter for years so I'm always looking for a “hook.” A hook is a simple thought that sticks in your head. Once I find a hook I build the article around it. From there the formula is almost always the same. Open, hook, expound, conclude, hook, and out. Of late I've learned about “SEO” or “Search Engine Optimization,” and I will construct according to that. I'm quite good at it, actually, and if you don't think so just Google “Killeen Independent School District,” and see what pops up on page one right UNDER their official web site!
From there I go through a distribution routine that I came up with, and watch the numbers roll. This is where you learn what people want in the morning. I've found that most people are just like me, I don't want to labor a point, and they don't want to put up with it. I try to obey the rules of syntax, but I don't get all psychotic about it. Back in high school my English teacher told me that I'd never be able to communicate in the English language. So, I just reinvented the language my way, and now I get read by thousands of people like me. Haven't read any of her articles, but I'm sure they're out there somewhere.
After that I touch base with people beginning the steady decent into cocktails. The next day the process begins all over again. One of the basic things about me is I'm happy with my life. There are little things I'd like to fix, but the pluses far outweigh the negatives. As I hone my writing skills, and venture into new areas (The Rise of the Algorithm) I expand my understanding of the human experience, and frankly, understand MY existence, which is complicated, but it's not, actually. I think I'm beginning to attain wisdom, which scares the hell out of me. I'd rather perfect the martini and learn to talk to my dog, which, after enough martinis, may very well happen. Consequently, I live alone.
Facebook now has this wonderful feature called “Memories.” As you know I write a bit, so my memories consist to a great degree of hundreds of previous articles, and since I've been under the scrutiny of publishers for quite some time now, I don't have to spell check much because I'm from Texas. I try not to “drill down” on any subject, flying high above the issues, and allowing my readers to form opinions on their own. Surprisingly I don't get much hate mail, unless you count that girl in India, but she's probably eating roaches anyway so what does she know? Anyway, I will look at the article a bit, and put it out there. I haven't been as widely read as I am now, so these pieces are new to some. Others who have seen them did so last year, two, or even three years ago, so the posting is nostalgic for them, or perhaps they didn't read it then, but do now. At any rate that gets the day rolling (and, again, I don't have to think much.)
I used to scan the news for ideas, but I've discovered that I can get more from talking with my dog so I gave that up, and I just check my mail. Ideas “cook” in my head. I honestly don't know where they come from, I just know that when one is done it pops out. Along about this time I get my morning call from Ted. Ted is my partner in this conspiracy, and he has more degrees than a thermometer, so he guides me toward a semblance of literacy, with is always a plus. He throws the ball, and I put it over the fence. I think I understand about every third word he says.
I don't get tied down by endless citing of facts. For one it’s boring. It bores me to write like that, and with my demographic of readers I KNOW it bores them, so I just don't do it. I try not to lie much, but I'm a Texan, and you know how we are. Hey, I've been married six times stand up Christian, so you know I can spin a yarn. Been run off so many times that I thought PMS meant
“Pack my stuff!” (Consequently, I live alone.) Everybody covers their butt, and no one looks into a mirror in the morning with an “S.O.B.” looking back.
I was a songwriter for years so I'm always looking for a “hook.” A hook is a simple thought that sticks in your head. Once I find a hook I build the article around it. From there the formula is almost always the same. Open, hook, expound, conclude, hook, and out. Of late I've learned about “SEO” or “Search Engine Optimization,” and I will construct according to that. I'm quite good at it, actually, and if you don't think so just Google “Killeen Independent School District,” and see what pops up on page one right UNDER their official web site!
From there I go through a distribution routine that I came up with, and watch the numbers roll. This is where you learn what people want in the morning. I've found that most people are just like me, I don't want to labor a point, and they don't want to put up with it. I try to obey the rules of syntax, but I don't get all psychotic about it. Back in high school my English teacher told me that I'd never be able to communicate in the English language. So, I just reinvented the language my way, and now I get read by thousands of people like me. Haven't read any of her articles, but I'm sure they're out there somewhere.
After that I touch base with people beginning the steady decent into cocktails. The next day the process begins all over again. One of the basic things about me is I'm happy with my life. There are little things I'd like to fix, but the pluses far outweigh the negatives. As I hone my writing skills, and venture into new areas (The Rise of the Algorithm) I expand my understanding of the human experience, and frankly, understand MY existence, which is complicated, but it's not, actually. I think I'm beginning to attain wisdom, which scares the hell out of me. I'd rather perfect the martini and learn to talk to my dog, which, after enough martinis, may very well happen. Consequently, I live alone.
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