First Squeeze

     Not everything is black and white. There is an array of grey there, and if you don't see that you miss ninety percent of life and understanding. I saw an article yesterday about First Lady Obama. Now, before I launch into this please understand I don't agree with most of what she says and does, but I didn't agree with any of the other First Ladies either. They end up in the White House and because they're married to the president you've got to do SOMETHING with them so you get these "causes" that make about as much sense as the tits on a boar hog. "No child left behind," "highway beautification," you name it. What they usually get makes no difference at all, but it keeps them busy and most of all it keeps them out of the way. Lincoln's wife was crazy. Most of the others were just ding bats who chased various windmills all over the country. 

     You have to show respect for Mrs. President. Part of being a simple ol' boy from Austin is this thing about respecting ladies and especially the President's wife! Of all the rumors and innuendo swirling around Obama the theory recently raised that Michelle being trans-gender set me back a bit. I watched Info Wars expound this idea with a straight face, especially the pretty lady commentator. Wow! Sure want to run a few martinis through her someday, but where was I? Now, I say some stupid crap. No, I'll admit it, I do. And I will do that for two reasons. First and foremost I AM stupid. I have a high school education from Killeen, Texas, 1969, and friends and neighbors that's about as close to being illiterate as you can get and still drive a car and read a stop sign at the same time, and it SHOWS! That's why when people meet me in person they are amazed that I am so quiet. It's better to be though a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt. The second reason is I am basically a song writer. When I write an article I try to make it go 'round in circles. There has to be a flow that returns to center. The human brain looks for that. That's why a song gets stuck in your head. You remember part of the song and your mind keeps looking for a logical conclusion until it finds it. I became a song writer simply because if I didn't know the song I'd just write my own words, complete it, and move on. The other thing is called a "hook." If you expect people to read anything you write you must put a hook in there. It doesn't matter if the hook is right, wrong, or just sharp, so long as it sticks. Something people will grab onto and remember. I did this just yesterday when I said all cops are crazy. My buddy, Mikee Bee seized upon that in very articulate scientific method letting me know real quick that such a blanket statement was clearly in error; I mean, SOMEWHERE on planet earth there simply MUST be a cop with good sense. Now, I've never seen it, but I will concede that there has to be one. See, that last statement is a "hook!" Gosh, I'm good. I'll swear before God and five other old white men that I'm good . . . hooked you again! Boy! Have I digressed! Back to Michelle.

     Yesterday there was this news story where the First Lady said that all black people should vote Democratic. News Flash! They've been doing that ever since Lyndon Johnson. He set them up pretty good, and they've held the party line ever since. Never mind Martin Luther King was a Republican. Then, she sucked in a breath and said after they voted they should have a big plate of soul food and fried chicken. Before I go on I'd like to say I LIKE fried chicken. I like turnip greens, Kool Aid and ribs, too. I'm sick and tired of black people trying to corner the market on things I like to eat! So, the conservative commentators leaped upon these statements like a bunch of savage rabbits. It was a joke! I appreciated her humor. The lady is black. She was turning the humor back on herself. That's a sign of mental health, to be able to poke fun at yourself. It wasn't earth shaking. Putin made no mention of it, and fried chicken on election day doesn't sound like a bad idea. Of all, the goofy stuff that has rolled out of Mrs. Obama's mouth this is not in the top five. 

     Getting back to shades of grey. This was one of them. We need to start accepting each other for who, and what we are. A down home statement like that made me sit back and think, "Now that was pretty cool!" Of course we know that Tuesday the American people handed El Presidenté his ass, but fried chicken wasn't a bad idea, and I'll bet Barry washed it down with a beer. You know, sometimes I think we may make that boy a Texan yet. There's always hope!