The Lost Art of Being Cool

     When you're young you spend a good deal of your time trying to be cool. Now cool is defined by peer pressure. As soon as cool is accepted as normal it is no longer cool, and you find yourself off in search of cool again. So what is cool? Cool is the way of appearing not to care while you really care. Cool is not mean. Cool is not disconnection. Cool is appearing to be above it all while being cognizant. 

     What attracts people to cool people is the temptation to get beyond the invisible wall surrounding the cool among us. Cool people don't ignore, they assimilate. Cool people don't argue, they satirize. Cool people know to keep their mouths shut when out of their element. 

     No one is born cool. Well, almost no one. Puck was born cool. You acquire cool as you age. That's Sean Connery. He was slick when he was young, but dag nabbit he was COOL when he got older! Obama will never be cool, but he'll always be slick. That guy on the Dos Equis commercial, he's pretty cool, but he only says one line, and that was written for him. Oh well, he looks cool. 

     Once you attain cool you must guard it. Bill Cosby was cool, now he has lawyers and supporters among the girls he missed. Now, George Carlin, he was COOL! He was cool years after his death. Rick Perry isn't cool, but he has some cool new glasses. People who are NOT cool? Al Sharpton comes to mind. Al is what we call a "one hit wonder" in the music business, and man is it getting old! Very uncool people! ANYBODY in the Middle East is not cool. Now THAT really gets old! 

     Youth is wasted on the young. If you pay attention, by the time you're sixty or so you will be reasonably cool. Unfortunately, by that time, there's nothing you can do about it so you become a gentleman, i.e. Sean Connery. If you try to act young at this stage of life you will transform from cool to old fool.     Alzheimer's soon follows, and you progress from cool to old fool to cold. 

     Their is no universal cool. That's why it changes from generation to generation. There are cool parameters but no stone cold cool. That's why people will say, "Hey! That's cool!" The pronouncement of cool sanctifies it, or at least does for a while. You must tailor your personal cool. What's cool on someone else will not be cool on you. There is only one letter difference between cool and fool. 

     Seek  cool all your life. Sometimes you only get five minutes of it in your lifetime. Savor that moment. If you can't hold onto it then at least learn from it. There are rules to retaining cool. Listen much, talk little, and don't hurt anyone. Build up others around you. They will think you're cool. Don't TRY to be cool. You either are or you are not. Cool is perception. If others see you as cool, then you're cool. If you come across as crass then no amount of money or training will make you cool. This is why all those classes on how to attract ladies do not work. It's like smiling at her through someone else's false teeth. It just won't fit. 

     So, here's to the cool among us. They inspire us, lead us on, and show us a spiritual side that even though we'll never understand, we can at least appreciate. Something to aspire to. If you can't be cool be alert. The world needs more lerts!